ridiculously blessed.

my little brother has asthma

he breathes loudly. i only really notice it when we are in church, and everyone else is breathing silently. 

then i am acutely aware.

the ability to breathe quietly never crosses my mind otherwise.

or, for that matter, the ability to breathe at all. 

last month i ended up with an expected car problem, which rendered my vehicle completely undriveable (which i recognize is not really a word).

until that moment when i was being chauffeured around by kind-hearted friends and family, i hadn’t appreciated my car. 

it was old, out-of-style, nothing flashy or interesting. the engine ran hot, which caused me to purchase two pints of oil a month to put in it. i always complained about that $6 purchase, every time.

and tonight, i have a sickness that has made my nose runny and my head blurry. as i was laying in bed trying to sleep (yet unable to, despite NyQuil), i found myself being grumpy.

then i remembered last year. 

on a lovely vacation to hawaii, my return flight ended up being more complicated than i had expected, leaving me loitering in the honolulu airport for about 48 hours. 

i wandered around, smelling the flowery-scented air, and enjoying myself. until darkness hit. then, i was exhausted and unhappy. i remember praying that God would help me sleep even just an hour or two.

those nights, i would daydream about my bed. 

i realized how nice it was to have a safe and comfortable place to sleep.

tonight, i began thinking about how many people (many of them old, sick, or children) are without a safe place to sleep tonight.

last month, i realized how nice it is to have a vehicle that is my own, no matter how unfashionable it may be.

and on a regular basis, i find myself unable to ignore how something so simple as being able to breathe, quietly or loudly, is an amazing gift.

i believe (with all my heart) that everything i have in this life is a gift from God, who loves me. 

my sister once said to me, “the things you take for granted are the things other people only dream of.” 

it’s true. complex and simple, i have been given much.

i use the term “ridiculously blessed” to describe myself. and i am. 

i am humbled.

and very grateful. 

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